We are surrounded by emotions. They are on TV everyday in the shows we watch. They surround us in our families. Our world revolves on emotion. Whether it be fear, anger, jealousy, or other emotions, the Self part of us will not let go. Over the last year, I have watched my Self slowly disappear little by little. Why? Because I refused to give energy to things I used to give energy to. I used to be easily provoked, I had to justify myself with everything, and I had to have the last word. I cried at the drop of a hat, weeping sometimes hysterically as the Self made me feel sorry for myself, and I allowed the Self to do this. I often cried in silence. This made me feel like a martyr more than ever. While I was weeping, my Self would remind me that my father told me I was stupid, an idiot, a blockhead, and thickhead, which would make me weep even more. It was a vicious circle, and I could not get off of it!
As I raised my vibration and came more into the Higher Self, this part of me told me not to react, not to cry, not to give energy to it. It told me that I am worthy, beautiful, and clever – either through me or through others. The Self did not like this. It did not want to let go of anything, never mind the emotion. The Higher Self, though, had kicked in and was not giving in. As I stated, slowly and surely the Higher Self took control and weaned me off of the emotional part of me. The interesting thing is that, once I let go of the emotional part of me, I became even more intuitive! I was so amazed. I could not see it when the Self was there, but as soon as the Self disappeared, I could see it so clearly!